I guess it's been a while, hasn't it. I have my reasons for going off the grid (so to speak), but I'm not going to go into them. Nobody wants a long, rambling post about the deep stuff on a Tuesday morning. Suffice it to say, there have been reasons and even coming back and writing this feels like a big task. You know when you put something off for so long and it suddenly becomes a lot bigger and a lot scarier than it started? That happened.
In reality, I'm writing this to prove to myself that I can. It's like a test, a challenge I'm setting myself that I have to complete. I have a habit of letting myself be overwhelmed by life. I take on projects or find new hobbies and suddenly cannot cope. I put a lot of pressure on myself to succeed and inevitably it all just gets so big and terrifying and I just...stop.
This is me not stopping.
I'm not ready to give up yet, I'm not ready to lose this blog as a creative outlet. But all the same, there are going to be some significant changes. I'm still not quite in a position to actually decide what those changes will be, but I do know that I'm not going to be limiting myself any more. I have lived and breathed books since I read Heidi in primary school with my teacher and learnt the word 'quenched'. My love for books will never be quenched. But there is a lot more to me than books, and I think it's time to let the other sides of me roam a little freer. At the moment I just want to write - I'm not worried what about, I just want to put pen to paper or finger to keyboard and make words.
I'm currently deciding whether to start entirely afresh, create a new blog and hope that there is still something in it that you delightful people find interesting. The other option is to stick with Lit Nerd and see where I can take it, and, again, hope that you will join me for the ride. Either way, I guess I'll let you know.
I don't know when this will be. Maybe this week, maybe next. Maybe October, maybe November. It may never happen, but I hope it doesn't come to that.
I love change, and I hope you do too.
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